GOORAMA!

Walmart is facing the threat of more than a thousand protests on Black Friday by workers demanding better pay and working conditions — not a great look for the world’s biggest retailer on one of the biggest shopping days of the year.

So why not find a way to make it look a little less bad?

Worker Center Watch, a website “dedicated to exposing Big Labor’s abuse of the worker center organizational model,” pitched in by putting out a video depicting America’s “professional protesters” earlier this month. According to TheNation.com, the website was actually registered by the former head lobbyist for Walmart’s firm — which gives some context to the hilariously absurd video.

According to Worker Center Watch, people protesting at retailers — all white, male youths — are paid to do it. They eat pizza and beer for breakfast after waking up in the afternoon. Then they actually look in the mirror and say: “Let’s protest!” before harassing customers. After all, “their job is to beat up your job.”

At the end, the narrator urges listeners: “This Black Friday, just buy your gifts, don’t buy their lies.”